Brent Terhune drops character and picks up almost all of the solar eclipse conspiracy theories. He includes rockets being fired at the sun but the moon sacrifices itself to save it, the guy next to you starts howling and turning into a werewolf, and that the path of totality leaves a trail of self-checkout lines, broken McDonald's ice cream machines and the watery ick that comes out when you forget to shake the mustard and ketchup.
The big one that Terhune missed is that the rapture happened this morning. So, if you're reading this, well, I have some bad news for you...
Open thread below...
