Everyone has that one drunk uncle that you want to avoid if at all possible and if you can't, you just cringe and try to deny even knowing them. You know the kind, belligerent to the neighborhood kids, obnoxious know-it-all but who is never around when you need a hand moving.
For Wisconsinites, that drunk uncle is Representative Derrick Van Orden, or as we not-so-fondly refer to him, DVO.
DVO got a late start for his bid for a Crookie this year, but he sure made up for lost time quickly.
In the end of July, DVO started to roll out the barrel by rolling a barrel into his office and holding a drunkfest with some campaign donors, er, constituents. Then, DVO decided it was a grand idea to take his drunken pals for a midnight tour of the Capitol, where he got to scream at some teenaged senate pages who were making memories on their last night as such. DVO even went so far as to play the "Do you know who I am?" card. DVO's behavior was so boorish and loutish that Senators Schumer and McConnell both apologized to the kids.
In October, Captain Anger Management Problems struck again, cussing out White House staffers who were trying to give a debriefing on the Octoberr 7th assault on Israel. And again, one of his colleagues had to apologize for his behavior.
About a week later, DVO again was outraged by a group of peaceful protesters calling for a ceasefire in Gaza. It paled in comparison to the January 6th riot he attended, let him tell you, and he will whether you want to hear it or not.
No wonder he's always angry. It's not just the booze. It's because he knows everything about everything and it's annoying when the rest of the world doesn't know squat.
Finally, the big, brave former Navy Seal who brags about never having run from a fight, cut and run when the going started getting rough. The Republican sheep in the House had no one to lead them after they canned McCarthy, a budget crisis was looming, there was the war in Ukraine and now a crisis in the Middle East. So what did DVO do? It sure as hell wasn't be a leader. Instead he fled for a photo op junket to where else, but Israel. Like the Secret Service and the military had nothing better to do than play nursemaid to his drunken ass in an area in crisis.
So DVO, this Crookie is for you. And yes, it's only one even though you're probably seeing two of them.
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